Monday, May 11, 2009

Taking it Moment by Moment (with Pics)

Thank you lord.

I called the neurologist and they will see me. Hubby had to take money to them before I could even make an appointment and will have to take more when I go for my appointment May 18, next Monday. I'm so very thankful that I was able to get in and pretty quickly at that. The money thing will be a little tough but we will figure it out because I can't continue this way.

Today I had probably the worst episode ever. My feet just curled up on me while standing and my skin felt all prickly almost like an electric current was running through me, then the convulsions started, it was not a pretty site. This time I even started making some type of strange sound, my head was going from side to side, limbs everywhere.

I honestly have never been more scared in my life than I am when I am in the middle of one of these episodes or attacks, not sure what to call them. They definitely feel like an attack on my body.

It's like I have no control over my body. And my bones ache like nothing I have ever experienced before. Thankfully this one only lasted 15 minutes but afterward I was exhausted. Then a few hours later I am ok. It's very confusing and frustrating. If you had seen me at certain times on Sunday. you would not believe anything is wrong with me.

I have identified some triggers to my symptoms. Any type of lifting, or strenuous activity will bring on an attack. I think attempting to paint my son's room and moving his furniture counts as strenuous activity, but I wanted to help do his room. It's a birthday present from his Godmother who will be coming on Wed. She lives in Ohio and I wanted to get the room ready and walls primed so she will have enough time to work her magic and create an awesome Star Wars room.

My best friend is a nurse and she has mentioned a few disorders she is concerned it might be but I'm trying not to think about them until we know for sure. I just want to know something, I want to know what this is and how it can be treated. I just want a doctor to look at me and tell me it's not in my head.
We will not be going to Nashville on Friday for the MRI. Hubby and I discussed it and decided that doctor is just not for me and all he will bring us are more medical bills.

The assistant I spoke to at the new Nero's office could not understand why they had not done an EMG since I am having a lot of numbness and tingling sensation in all my extremities. I'm not sure why they didn't do that test either. The did do every other test imaginable.

I'm just grateful I can get into this Neurologist. I used to see him many years ago for my migraines and hopefully he will be kind and do everything to try and find out what is going on. Because honestly, I'm not sure how much longer I can take this not knowing. This, whatever this is, is debilitating most days, but there are days or even just hours where I have little or no symptoms.

Here are some of those moments from Sunday.

I actually got dressed and was able to put on makeup. It's the little things these days that I appreciate more than ever before.

I will never outgrow this and I know the whole raw egg thing is not good but I have done this for 20 plus years and it is just so darn good.

My princess.

Mom was thrilled about getting a green purse, again, the little things in life :)

They had to deliver the cake to me in bed because when they started on the cake I was fine licking beaters and posing for pictures but by the time the cake was done I had to be in bed to deal with another attack.

I'm just trying to take this moment by moment, get through the bad ones and enjoy every second of the good ones.

I just have to add that God is so good and knows exactly what we need, today was tough but he sent someone to me who can relate somewhat to what I am going through and it was great to talk to someone who has been there.


Girl Child said...

i was thinking how you worked in the garden before ur spells came back!! but i didn't want to sound like i had any clue, but definitely take it easy (tho that must be SOO boring).. oh and I CANT tell you what you won!! then it wouldn't be a surprise when it comes in in the mail!! speaking of which.. you still never sent me ur addy.. I have a couple of cute things I picked up so far.. ;)

He And Me + 3 said...

Praying for you. I loved the pictures from Mother's Day. Very sweet. YOur kids are precious! You are blessed. I hope that they figure this out very soon.

Transparent Tulip said...

prayingfor God's provision for you guys. The Lord will provide. You're children are adorable.
Love in Christ,

Carrie said...

I pray for the doctors to find an answer to all of this so it can be treated! I'm so sorry you are still dealing with these episodes, I can't imagine how hard it is on you.

I'm so glad you still had a wonderful birthday and Mother's day! the pictures are adorable and I love the green purse, so cute!

Take it easy and rest...I know easier said than done. Hope to see pics of your son's room! I bet he's excited :)

Jenn said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I had hoped you would feel well enough to enjoy it!!

I'm so glad that you are going to a different doctor. I know your hands are tied a lot by your insurance situation, but I think you and Jose are right that he's just going to end up costing you more money and no answers. You NEED answers!!! What is happening to you is not right, and it's not fair for someone to treat you the way he did just for trying to get help.

I'll be keeping a watch for how things go. Call me if you need to talk!!!

marla said...

thinking about you. Hope things get better. the boys finish preschool on the 21st and I'll bring the boys over sometime if you are feeling up to it. Love you!!!

Girl Child said...

hey mama.. hope u r having a blast with ur bff there.. I am sending out ur prize tomorrow.. at least I fully plan on sending it out tomorrow.. ;)

Tanya said...

I am praying for you, looking at your pictures you are blessed with such a beautiful family. Happy belated birthday and Mother's day.

nancygrayce said...

I've been out of town, Keisha, I hope you're doing better. I hope to see an update soon!!!

Tanya said...

Hope you are doing better, it's been quite on your blog, mine too. Just checking in on you.